As a little girl (with no brothers), I saw my mama’s bare belly plenty of times. But never for very long….because of the stretch marks. Those pearly-white lines etching patterns into her body. Like rivers on a road map. Like a tattoo that she never really signed up for.
I’d ask about them (because I didn’t have any yet – surely I needed those to be a beautiful woman like she was (is). She also had a big, puffy C-section scar – twice cut open. I needed one of those too…) and she’d laugh them off and say something along the lines of,
“You were worth it.”
I never understood what that meant until now, in my third trimester, with my third baby.
Those lines.
They weren’t something ugly, like my mama thought but would never say out loud. No. They were a bartering tool.
My mama, like all mamas, traded her body for my life.
What a precious, flawless thought.
And that’s exactly what this journey of pregnancy is. A handing over. An act of trust. Submission to whatever may come. Stretch marks, c-section scars, the swollen ankles, nausea, the acne. All of it – simply part of the deal. Some women go through the journey unmarked, while others take on a heaping bag of stuff. And the truth is, nobody goes into pregnancy and SIGNS UP for this stuff. I won’t pretend that I, like many other women, haven’t sought out ways around the stretch marks and cellulite.
But….
When we devote time (too much time) worrying about how we’ll look after that baby comes or whether we’ll be marked up, we miss out on the beauty of submission and what the end result provides us with. New life! A small chance to play a bigger role in something beautiful.
I would challenge us all, myself included, to look at our bodies with a little more grace, pregnant or not. And THIS is why I won’t be sharing any anti-stretch mark tips with you. Because in doing so, I would in a small way be contributing to the idea that our bodies, squiggly lines and all, are things that need to be changed.
And they aren’t.
————
splendid…lindsay
StephanieGig says:
Save your money!! I used to use Lady Soma’s Stretch Mark Treatment – its $34. . .It was OK, but instead I started using Lady Soma’s Skin & Nail Treatment and it worked so much better on both my stomach and thigh marks! And its 1/3 the price! Only $16, and it lasts a long time. Save your money. They prob raised the price of the Stretch Mark Treatment, but get the Lady Soma Skin & Nail Treatment and use it on your stretch marks – it works BETTER and you save money. . .
Eva says:
Beautiful post! And great for any woman to read. I’m 22, but this is a wonderful reminder that you see what you want to see.
Brittany says:
This is one of the most beautiful posts I have ever read. I have always looked at my stretch marks as ugly, divots in my skin that make me less of a person. I have stretch marks because of unhealthy weight gain and not pregnancy, but always feared they would get worse with pregnancy later in my life. You’ve completely opened my eyes to a whole new point of view. Thank you!
purelytwins says:
beautiful post!! and that picture…precious!
Annette@FitnessPerks says:
Beautifully written!
Melissa @ Treats With a Twist says:
I love this! I hate how scared of stretch marks so many people are, but they don’t ruin your life! They’re proof of where you’ve been and there’s no shame in that at all.
Brittany (Healthy Slice of Life) says:
Such a beautiful post, Lindsay! <3
Brooke says:
Golly, you made me all goose bumpy. So so so true. And so beautifully said. Thank you for allowing yourself to be used by HIM and him!!
Jess @ Blonde Ponytail says:
Love this. And the picture of you and Clara melts my heart.
Holly @ EatGreatBEGreat says:
Since I’m new to your blog, this was definitely a wonderful first read. Beautifully said and I appreciate your honest perspective!
lindsaymwright says:
thanks, Holly! And welcome!! :)
She Rocks Fitness says:
First of all that picture is BEAUTIFUL and so is this post! XOXO
Katie sB says:
BEAUTIFUL post! Thank you for this!
Katie says:
So beautiful. I was just looking at my (weirdly shaped) belly button this morning, and thought…that’s such a small price to pay! Love, love, love you.
Brittany @ Delights and Delectables says:
Oh friend… this is BEAUTIFUL… I love your thoughts and heart. I wish I could give you the biggest hug right now! xoxoxo
Brittany @ Delights and Delectables says:
ps… this “My mama, like all mamas, traded her body for my life.” is hauntingly beautiful.. and I can’t get it off my mind!
Mollie @Sprinkles of Life says:
LOVE the pic of you, baby, and Clara!
Shaunna says:
Love you Lindsay. You make something that I dread and turn it into something wonderful. I will read this every day!
Domi @ Eat, Pray, Lift says:
The thought of mamas trading their bodies for their babies’ lives reminds me of Isaiah 53:5 – “…By His stripes we are healed.” Life-giving scars. Just another reminder of the greatest love.
lindsaymwright says:
LOVE the correlation!
lindsay says:
oh yes, well said DOmi. And beautiful linz. I love how motherhood shines through you. A gift and you always encourage me, even though i’m not a mother yet.
Hannah @ Tales From The Last Frontier says:
Beautiful! I think this post is so wonderful and insightful :)
Cait @ Beyond Bananas says:
Well this made me tear up…as I spend each morning after showering examining my new body in the mirror. The tiny stretch marks, the bulge that currently hangs over my c-section scare at 26 days postpartum… but how true is it. My body was able to carry two babies.. at one time… to 38 weeks gestation. Over 13 pounds of baby. Do I cringe sometimes when I look in the mirror? Yes, occasionally. But I certainly don’t cringe when I look at my beautiful newborn twins … and my body is the reason they are here.
Lee says:
I got stretch marks during puberty. I’ve had them for so long that I don’t even notice them anymore.
Lauren @ Me and the Mountains says:
Same here! (of course- because we are the same person…). I grew rapidly in height in weight around age 11 and all of the sudden had stretch marks. I didn’t know what they were and I was mortified. But now, like you said- they’ve been a part of me for SO long that I don’t even think about them. I’d rather NOT have them- but that’s life.
Krysten Siba Bishop (@darwinianfail) says:
BEAUTIFUL! I love this and you! And that adorable bump kissing picture!
Ashley @ My Food N Fitness Diaries says:
I love this so so so much, Lindsay! I can’t wait to share this with the girls in my MOPS group. Thank you. xoxo
Paige @ Your Trainer Paige says:
:)
This right here is why I love ya, Lindsay!
Carly @ Snack Therapy says:
This is absolutely wonderful. I’m not a mama (nor do I plan to be anytime soon), but I love this message so dang much.
Emz says:
Awesome. Love this
Amelia @i_heart_kale says:
I have mixed feelings about my stretch marks. Mine are not from pregnancy but from a point in my life where I was obese and now have had lost the weight. I used to be embarrassed and loathe looking at myself in the mirror, swimsuit, and being naked in front of my husband. One day he asked me about them and I flat out gave him my thoughts. He told me that he loved me, all parts, stretch marks included, and that I should be proud of how far I have come. So to this day, I’m not fond of having them leftover, but they do serve as a reminder of what I have accomplished and how strong I am.
With weight loss aside and just looking at pregnancy, the moment that we have the chance to have a baby (God willing and still praying), my body will be for my baby and making sure that I do everything in my power to bring it into this life healthy. It won’t be about me anymore.
Thanks as always for your amazing posts!! :)
clare @ fittingitallin says:
perfect.
Jamie @ Rise.Run.Mom.Repeat. says:
Love.
I have ’em. Lots of ’em.
Yes, my babies were worth it and yes, even knowing what my stomach would end up looking like, I’d have had them anyway.
That said, I’d very much like to lose the stretchmarks and keep the kids. ;)
Becky @ Olives n Wine says:
This is amazing. Thank you for sharing your honest perspective that all women (mamas or not!) can most definitely benefit from <3
Tina @ Best Body Fitness says:
I teared up at that quote about trading a body for a new life. How TRUE!
Linz @ Itz Linz says:
LOVE LOVE LOVE!
Carla says:
OMGOSH I ADORE THIS.
and you.
(((sharing)))
lindsaymwright says:
thanks friend!
Momshomerun says:
I’m proud of my stretch marks. I consider them proof that I have lived! And given life.
Tara | Treble in the Kitchen says:
So insightful Lindsay :) I love it!