Yesterday was one of those not-so-good days.
By 2pm, I was done and I still had the rest of the day to go.
I know the problem: I tried to cram too many things into our day.
Sometimes I can get away with this, but not yesterday. Between trying to get the four of us out the door and to the track for Trackstars and trying to do school and visiting with family and getting to the pool and back home before naptime (which shouldn’t be stressful but it always is) and baths and meal planning and house cleaning for our dinner guests – it was all just too much. (Wasn’t I just talking about how refreshed I felt?!?) It all came to a screeching halt when I made Travis come home so that I could cry on his chest. He just let me cry and talk and cry some more. (This man….there are no words. He puts up with a lot.)
Last year I made quite a few changes that drastically reduced my stress level. I stripped away everything, bare bones. I said no. I said no to a lot of things that I really wanted to do. I said no to things I would have been GREAT at. I said no so that I could say YES to the people and the things that mattered most.
But yesterday, I noticed.
I’ve been saying “yes” and “maybe” a little more lately.
To projects that pull me away from my family.
To just stuff.
And while I can multitask and add in a few things here and there, I know that there will always be that pull. That whisper to do more. To be pulled away from my calling of staying at home.
I’m here, writing this all out, because I want you to know that I don’t have it all together. I don’t. I cry and I complain and I make mistakes just like you. The bits and pieces that I share on the blog are just that: bits and pieces … of a much larger, much foggier picture.
So I feel you, mama.
I feel you, friend.
I see your broken and I see my broken and I know that we share something. Whether you’re a stay-at-home mom or a working mom or a 20 something with no kids, the demands of this life are overwhelming. The balancing act that it takes for me to make it through one day….well…it’s fatiguing. Sometimes I just want to race to get those three kids to bed so that I can have a moment. Don’t get me wrong. I live a very blessed life. I have so very little to complain about. I suppose it’s all relative. My “hard” might be your “easy” and vice versa. Even so, we all have our own hard.
What helps me get back to the place of feeling centered and focused (aside from that initial cry which is a must for me personally) is remembering that I have a choice. I can choose to praise rather than complain. To speak blessing rather than harsh words. I can choose JOY over stress. I’m even blessed enough with the choice to stay at home (while others are not even given that option). I have a choice.
And I love the freedom in that.
I’ll shoot for 100%. But I’ll miss the goal more than enough times. There will be those not-so-great days. Thankfully I’ve got a husband’s chest to cry on, children that nap when I need a break and a Father who pours out His mercy on me when I don’t deserve it.
QUESTION: How do you cope with those hard days? What is stressing you right now?