“Mama, may I go to Nan’s??”

Henry asks me this everyday around 2 o’clock.

He asks for permission.

After calling to make sure it’s actually with Nan, I usually grant him this permission.  I’m the adult.  He’s the kid.  There’s a power hierarchy here.

So who grants ME permission to do things?

I do.

As an adult, I am in control of myself.  Whoa. Novel idea, right?!?


Skittles. All day. If she was in control.

I am in control of my body, my relationships, my attitude, my fitness level, what I eat (or do not eat), how I perceive myself.  Guess what?!  You are too!

With this control, we have a great responsibility.  And with that responsibility, the chance to make our lives better or worse.  I see a lot of people (mostly on Facebook – I don’t know why I even get on there) blaming others for their own situations.  This I cannot understand.  I also hear it when I talk to others about their weightloss or their fitness level – something or someone is getting in the way – never THEM.


Me?  M&M’s all the way.

What we sometimes fail to do is give ourselves permission to be in control of our own lives.  To allow ourselves that responsibility and THEN to accept the outcome of those choices.  To quote Star Wars, “take care of yourself…it’s what you’re best at.”

Today, let’s give ourselves permission to:

  • REST, if that’s what our body needs.
  • REST, if that’s what our MIND needs.
  • eat healthy foods to fuel our workouts.
  • eat chocolate-covered cashews to fuel our souls.
  • move a little. 
  • move a lot.
  • drink that Diet Coke if it’s what we need to get through that trapped, snowy day.
  • force down that green drink that helps us poo.  (you know the one….)
  • sit on the couch for as long as it takes.  All day if need be.
  • forgive a friend who has said things behind our backs.
  • ask for forgiveness because WE were that bad friend.
  • change our attitude when it needs to be changed.

Here’s the one rule (and where that darn responsibility part comes in to play):  Whatever we give ourselves permission to do, we have to take OWNERSHIP of.  Because we are the ones in control – every individual for himself.

WE are allowed permission …. and we needn’t even ask for it.


QUESTION:  How often do you blame others?  Know people who chronically do this?  Do you enjoy being an adult?  <-not always.


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  1. great post! of course i do love being an adult, but yes sometimes it would be nice to go back and be a kid again haha! itz definitely important to be responsible with your actions especially as an adult – you’re so right!

  2. Yikes. I can OWN IT when it comes to my nutrition, training, work, etc. But when it comes to certain things, like my self-esteem or my relationship with my mom (um, yeah, those are totally entwined haha), I find myself blaming the past/my experiences/other people. Thanks for the butt-kicking reminder!

  3. It’s like you’re speaking directly to me today, Lindsay! I drank a diet coke and ate chocolate because my soul needed it and I’m switching up the workout schedule because my body needs it. Thanks for reminding me that guilt isn’t going to do any good, but permission and acceptance will set me free :)

  4. Needed this today, especially this:

    Whatever we give ourselves permission to do, we have to take OWNERSHIP of. Because we are the ones in control – every individual for himself.

    SO true. in every aspect. own decisions, actions, everything.

  5. Love this, Linds! Really, I think that’s what it’s about. We’re adults. If you want the damn cookie, eat it (to paraphrase Jen Comas Keck)… But own it! That means not being guilty about it. If you need rest, rest. If you need to push yourself to move, push. But then own it and know that every decision you make (thanks to God’s free will, hey?) is in your power to make when it comes to what you eat, how you spend your time, etc. Thanks for this reminder! I knowingly bought some “healthy” chips (which are still chips) and ate them last night; enjoyed every bite and owned up. No guilt this morning, but maybe next time I won’t follow them up with wine too. ;) Have a great weekend!

  6. Well written, Lindsay. We are all in control of ourselves. This includes how WE perceive ourselves and how WE feel. No one else is controlling us, but us. It’s taken me years to realize this and with a husband who said, “stop caring what others think! You are in control of you.” Happy weekend!!!!