First, let me tell you how amazing all these “Ask Me Anything” questions are! Out of about 75 questions, I only go one that ruffled my feathers (and I won’t be sharing), and I think your questions will make for great future posts. Future, being the important word.
Let me be honest here.
I’m run ragged. Tired. Irritable. Sore. And simply stressed to the limit.
Lately I’ve taken on too much.
I’ve noticed – it’s cyclical for me. I’m the queen of saying yes, of taking on too much. Then I CRACK. Then I slow down for a about a split second. And I feel great for having less on my plate.
I start comparing myself to others – to their busyness and their accomplishments….and their mess. Then I slowly start adding to the list.
- “Sure, I can do another show. I’d be so bored if I didn’t. Let me rope Travis into this one!”
- “I have that one hour open on Thursdays. I can take another client. Squeeze two in if I rearrange a few things.”
- “Henry should know how to add and subtract numbers 10 through 20. We need to work on this. Like NOW!”
We got chickens. Add that to the list of things that would be nice, but we don’t need right now.
The truth is:
- I SHOULDN’T have signed us up for Cinderella – we need to get moved into this dang house.
- I DON’T need more clients – two hours of KidZone a day is enough for my children.
- And I SHOULDN’T place undue pressure on this homeschooling thing – my brilliant son is only FOUR years old!
It all hit me last week like a ton of bricks. The CRACK in the cycle, if you will. And I sobbed on my poor husband’s shoulder for an hour. And he was there, as he always is, to tell me that I needed to be doing less. And that the things I DO should not define WHO I am. Repeat:
THE THINGS I DO SHOULD NOT DEFINE WHO I AM.
Then WHY? WHY am I drawn to the busy? WHY?!? I’ve already written like three posts with this same theme, yet I haven’t changed. Maybe a little. But not enough to stop myself from the crashing. Last Friday’s post about resting our bodies was what many of you needed to hear. I’ve already mastered that. What I haven’t tackled is my need for rest in all the OTHER areas of my life.
Prayer is needed (and ongoing). I fully trust that the crashing happens so that I come to rely on God more and more. I obviously can’t do this myself. But I have to CHOOSE to do less. I have to choose that – no one else. (These words just came to mind: I need to rest FROM things and rest IN Him.)
After I finish a few obligations, this simply must be a season of rest* for me.
Because all of this DOING (going, striving, beating, racing) will be my UN-doing.
QUESTION: Am I the only one who struggles with taking on too much? Any tips on saying no more often?
*More on this to come.