….and forget the rest.

That’s about where I’ve landed in life.

Call me a dreamer, but I use to think that I could please everyone.  Somehow talk to people and make them see my side of things.  The classic people pleaser.

Now.  I’m jaded.

The truth is:  You can’t please everyone.

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Here’s why:  Everyone has their own opinion.  About everything. 

And most want to tell you WHY they came to such opinion.

(that could be called “preaching” – I like to see it as “sharing.”)

My life is an open book for anyone who wants to see.

A list of the things I do that others might not agree with:

  • I homeschool my kids.
  • I’m a conservative Republican.
  • I talk about sex.
  • I have natural births.
  • I am my husband’s helpmate.  Not his boss.
  • I breastfeed my babies.
  • I believe in God.  Jesus.  The Holy Spirit and speaking in tongues.
  • I spank my kids.  (almost wrote “discipline my kids through physical child training”, said screw it, and went with spank.)

The one thing all of these declarations have in common?  They start with the letter “I”.

Meaning I do these things.  Me. 

And I would never presume that you would feel the same about these issues.  They are what I have chosen to do.  Where my convictions have led ME.

I don’t need to justify myself to anyone (although sometimes I want to SO badly).  The only person that I’ll be held accountable to is God. 

There’s such comfort in that.  For this people pleaser.

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Maybe your life and views look completely opposite of mine. 

That’s fine. 

In fact, THAT’S the message I want to get across today. 

Live your life in such a way that you can’t imagine it any other way.

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The choices you make – they’re yours.  That’s the great thing about life – you get a choice

Just make sure you choose wisely.

Follow your convictions.  OWN THEM.

With no judgment for what others are doing.

End of preaching sharing time. 

QUESTION:  What are some of YOUR lifestyle choices that others might not agree with?

splendid…lindsay

  1. Pingback: Bean Bytes #7
  2. Amanda @ Diary of a Semi-Health Nut says:

    You literally can’t please everyone because not everyone is the same! So very true!

    I am such a friggin people pleaser though! I try not to be, but at the same time, I do think there is a balance. We shouldn’t just be rude to people because we believe different things.

    So although you are standing up for what you believe in, you are doing it in a nice way. Kudos to you friend! :)

    Also yay for having a hubby who a. Talks to you about blogging stuff and b. Is wise telling you not to poke the bear. :)

  3. Jenny @ simply be me says:

    If we were all the same the world would be a boring place! The great thing about life is we get to choose who we let in and to what extent. Having respect for others opinions and views doesn’t mean you always have to agree – one of my best friends and I approach how we raise our children differently but we are constantly learning from each other and respect each others decisions.

  4. Katie @ Talk Less, Say More says:

    I absolutely love this! I love your honesty and I love your THIS IS ME AND TAKE ME AS I AM OR DON’T attitude – I think it’s great! And it’s definitely something I need to remember about myself more often. Take me as I am, own who I am, and don’t feel the need to explain myself or my decisions to others. Take me as I am.

  5. Emily says:

    I could not disagree more with many of your “truths”, but I have so much respect for you and this blog that you have built that it does not even matter. I love your “take it or leave it” approach and your confidence. You do you, you own it. And I’ll do me:)

  6. Danica @ It's Progression says:

    Anytime I feel judged or I catch myself starting to judge someone else, I remind myself that the only judgment that matters is God’s, so there’s no reason for anyone else to cast it…I love your confidence and that you stand proud of who you are–truly an inspiration, Lindsay.

  7. Cat @ Breakfast to Bed says:

    we are pretty much polar opposites on a lot of these fronts, but I love you just the way you are!!! Though, having one “unmedicated” and one “medicated” birth (all births, imo are natural) I’d choose the drugs every time. :)

  8. Melissa @ Live, Love, & Run says:

    I love that you are who you are and you embrace it. I LOVE that about you! You’re right…people have opinions. What bothers me is when people are so closed-minded that they stick to an opinion and refuse to see the world from many different levels/angles/views, etc. Or if someone forms an opinion because someone they like/know have the same one. If someone I’m talking to can tell me something that really changes the way I see things, I’ll say it! I think the problem is that it’s so hard for people to accept the opinions of others as simply opinions. It doesn’t mean we can’t be friends, can’t speak to them, or have to argue every bit of what they say. Man…I could get heavy here. lol

  9. Katie says:

    Thanks Marcee! And absolutely I DO NOT believe in HITTING my child out of anger. However, a calm swat to train and discipline, followed by kind words and a hug…I sure do.

  10. Maria says:

    Exactly what I need to hear today! Thank you for the boost of confidence!

    And I must say that I pretty much agree with everything on that list – so much in common with you and that’s a rarity I feel. Especially since I live here in the Bay Area… that’s all I have to say about that :)

    • Marcee .... ILLINOIS says:

      Fan of your posts Katie.

      Do you also believe in hitting/spanking? I cannot ever imagine Adrienne’s mama doing that to her. No way.

  11. STUFT Mama says:

    Totally needed this today. I’m such the people pleaser and it’s not okay. It’s really hard though when those closest to you don’t approve of what you’re doing. Those people that you care about pleasing the most. I’m struggling with that a bit over here. Ugh. I need to remind myself that GOD is the only one I really need to be concerned with pleasing. LOVE YOU!!!!!! Love this post!!!!!!!

  12. Calee (@chimes) says:

    I love this post. I’m really glad you wrote this to address the comments from last week’s post (and other things — and work through it yourself).

    I’m a people pleaser too, but somewhere along the lines I decided “SCREW IT.”

    What I love about you is that you don’t preach these things and that you’re accepting of others for their choices. I am a bunch of those things on the list (okay future me is a bunch of those things on the list because I obviously haven’t had kids yet). I will never homeschool as Mark’s mom is a HUGE advocate for public education, but I will most definitely work with my children to improve their learning and make that a big priority (and pack their lunches, because seriously, school lunch? wtf)

    I don’t have a political affiliation. I’m nothing. I’m some from column A and some from column b. Believe it or not, I voted republican last election because I didn’t really like Obama. I don’t really love either candidate, but Romney kind of scares me. The biggest issues to me are civil rights (women’s and LGBTQ), and keeping religion out of public. I can see an argument for it, but I don’t like the government mandating one religion for this mixing pot country that was founded on the freedom to practice whatever religion somebody chooses.

    I typically stay away from voicing my opinion on anything politically (except the civil rights issues) because honestly, I can’t make a difference, and because most of the rest of the issues wouldn’t make or break my life if they were changed.

    Also, my current soapbox topic: Leashing your dog. Most dog owners wouldn’t agree with me on that one. I’m planning a post sometime soon about it, but am working on a t-shirt / graphic to go with it.

  13. Lisa says:

    That Dr. Suess is a smart cookie. We are all different people, so of course we will all have different opinions of things, and that is what makes the world unique and makes the world go round. How boring would it be if we were all the same and had all the same beliefs.

  14. Ashley @ My Food 'N' Fitness Diaries says:

    I need this reminder on a regular basis because I’m a classic people pleaser as well. It’s something that I’ve discovered about myself through the years, and it’s something I’m always trying to work on. I WANT to not care what others think and I WANT people to like me… But it’s not always gonna happen, and I have to accept that. Great post!

  15. Amanda @RunToTheFinish says:

    If I could give you a fist bump I would ;) I have tried to tell people this forever…their choices don’t impact me so if they are happy then who the heck cares!!!

    My big choice was obviously recently quitting a job. GASP in this economy?! GASP to be a writer?! But it felt right and I knew it needed to happen.

  16. Bonnie says:

    Well said, Lindsay, well said! What might people not agree with in my life? Well certainly my convictions about Jesus as the only way, the truth and the life to God; possibly IF (I didn’t know Travis did that! cool!); how we’re not “saving” money – actually, no quotation marks needed – we’re not! We’re trying to be wise with our money but also living in the moment where God leads – so our lifestyle…There are probably a few. ;) But the neat thing if just that – GOD is leading, and I am happier to follow his call as he’s shown himself faithful rather than what those around me say, even if it might make me more acceptable.

    Love you lots! Thanks for sharing, Lindsay. :D

  17. Laura @ Mommy Run Fast says:

    I grew up wanting to be a people pleaser too, and soon learned that’s not the healthiest way, and it’s silly. We should absolutely stand behind our convictions, while also respecting and supporting those who have come to very different conclusions. Well said, Lindsay!

  18. Heather says:

    Love it. From another conservative Republican who WILL spank her kids when she has them, I think you are awesome. We are held to this unattainable standard as bloggers and its so sad that people feel the need to point it out when we are doing something “wrong”. Keep going girl!

  19. Colleen @ The Lunchbox Diaries says:

    LOVE this post – it’s exactly what I needed today. For some semi-pathetic self-disclosure: I literally cried myself to sleep last night because I’m letting other people’s opinions control some recent decisions and it’s become so exhausting and overwhelming. Thanks for writing this, Lindsay!

  20. Sara says:

    I love and appreciate this post. I’m realizing I like to either keep my opinions to myself or even “soften” them up in order to please (appease!) the people around me. I’m a grown woman–got to stop that!!
    Fantastic post, as usual! Thank you!

  21. lindsay says:

    Youre following GODs will, and that’s all that matters. I love you more for it! I think you do what you do to encourage others as well Linz. A spiritual gift.

    Pretty woman you are. inside and out!

  22. Tami Grandi says:

    This is a GREAT post- I’m a people pleaser also so I have to fight that daily! Ummm… the one thing that people look at me strange for is the fact that I choose to remain pure while I am waiting (and at 37 it’s no easy feat) and that I choose not to drink. So, I guess that’s two things ;) Have a great day!

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