I honestly wanted to write a post today titled, “I Have To Break Up With Your Blog.”
It was gonna be awesome.
I wanted to rant and rave about how some bloggers shouldn’t label themselves “Healthy Living” because what they’re doing/eating/saying is FAR from healthy.
It’s downright silly.
That they should start eating more carbs, exercising less. Ban the word “CHEAT” from their vocabulary.
Oh, and “sugar free.” So many chemicals.
In the shower before church, I started planning out the post in my head.
The post would be cutting edge and a wee bit combative. I’d get lots of supportive, “Yeah! Throw ‘em in the dungeon”-type comments.
Then I went to church.
And was blown away by God.
(This happens most Sundays, but man, we’ve been having some amazing services the past month or so.)
After spending time in that special place, I knew I had to throw that post out.
It’s meant for someone else to write. (And I’ll probably agree with everything she/he says.)
That post (and the way I would have written it) is judgmental. And it’s simply not my job to convict.
I have absolutely no right to judge anyone.
For how they live, for what they write or eat or say or do.
Am I allowed to have an opinion about these matters? Yes. Are my opinions supposed to be judgmental or haughty? No.
The fact of the matter is: I may not judge because I am not blameless.
You think you’re so blameless, huh?
TRUTH: I am not the healthiest person.
Just last week, I admitted I over exercise. That certainly isn’t healthy.
I probably eat far too few calories for my activity level. And way too many brownies. That isn’t healthy.
I still have unhealthy thoughts about body image.
Some days, I don’t have time to brush my teeth more than once.
Two years ago, I drank AT LEAST three Diet Rites a day!
I just heard egg yolks are bad for you. I eat eggs all the time.
Burn The Chaff.
It’s so easy to look at others when WE are the real problems.
How hypocritical!
Perhaps it would serve me better to take that angry post from earlier and write it to myself.
To start being the change I want to see.
I want to refine MY life. Not somebody else’s.
With a winnowing fork and hot flame, I want MY chaff to be burnt. MY problems. MY fallacies.
Lord knows I’ve got a lot of work to do.
It’s not my job to judge someone else.
So I simply won’t.
What I will do is judge MYSELF.
That’s where my work begins….
That IS my job.
QUESTION: I have no question. Just let this one sink it.
splendid…lindsay
I have written that post.
And now I am on the eve of writing a post like that against myself. [Sort of.]
Thank you for being on the same wavelength, for not not judging, and for admitting (as I am about to do) some hypocritical tendencies.
Wow. Great post. Been struggling with this recently myself, so it was a nice reflective lightbulb moment to come across this blog and this post at just this moment in time.
What a great reminder! It’s something I’m trying to work on everyday and in part I’m trying to surround myself with people of the same mind and nature. I’m trying to rid the people that bring about judgement or rudeness or negativity from my life, because really how are they helping anyone? So thank you for this! :)
I love reading your posts! They are truly a joy to read. I love the perspective you have and how you always come to wiser conclusion after talking and sorting thru it all. Awesome–you rock! :)
Great thoughts!
I agree that judging others is wrong–especially because it is usually just reflecting our own insecurities or issues.
However, coming from a place of love, there is nothing wrong with being concerned for someone. It is VERY different from judging them… and like I said, comes from love instead of malice or criticism. (For example, I have a friend whom I love dearly, but want to help her with her eating issues. It has nothing to do with me, but all because I love her and want to help her). VERY different from “that girl is messing up. I should just tell her what she’s doing is wrong & she’s hurting herself.” <–besides, that usually ends up in a bad way anyways.
<3
Love this. And I probably would’ve agreed with everything you said in your original post idea too, but I know that it’s not nice to judge. I need to stop worrying about others, and what other people think of me, and start focusing more on myself.
This is a great post. I can definitely relate to your thoughts and feelings. I’m the same way with my ‘healthiness’ – sure, I may appear healthy on the outside but there are definitely some things I struggle with emotionally/mentally (such as working out too much, while still eating the normal amount of calories.) God has a way of revealing His truth to us at the most perfect moments. Thanks again for the post.
Beautiful! :) These are my favorite posts! And the “you think you’re so blameless photo” of Clara is precious!
Wow, wow, wow. Dammit, you are right. As much as I too want to rant about some of those bloggers you mention, it IS judgemental, and what’s the point in that? It is not right. What is right is judging ourselves against ourselves and that is all. Excellent post, excellent words, excellent perspective!
thank you madam!
DANG! I feel like so many women are posting about the un-healthy culture that has become of “healthy living blogs” and it is SO TRUE! However, I admire you for not wanting to point fingers and judge others. It is not our place. All we can do is shine our light and ask the Lord to help “me, as an individual and follower of HIM” remove the planks in my own eye… because there are many.
Love you woman!
love you right back.
This cracked me up, I’m the queen of writing to do lists and then never doing them…oops. p.s. I also have not had even a half a tan since I got pregnant with my son. And he’s 3 1/2. It’s pretty sad!
Sinking in! Wow, I have been thinking the same sort of thoughts about “healthy living blogs” and how they effect my mentality. AKA not good because most are not healthy. But then I am left thinking the same as you. Who am I to judge when I am far from perfect (although my perfectionist nature would like to fix that if I let it). Thank you for posting this. We come to the blog world to release our thoughts, but then the human nature of judging still comes in and I think we stop thinking of what our blog does for us and more about how others will perceive it. Only God can judge us and it is up to us to live for him and not worry about other people’s perceptions of healthy, beautiful, successful, ect.
I eat 2 eggs everyday ;) so people can judge away.
plus eat avocado everyday, some people say I eat way to much fat. But as you said, I am refining my life! It changes everyday, and that is the blessing. We have the right to change.
great post girl!
It was actually blogs like yours (Claire’s, Julie’s, Katie’s, Ashley’s, Lindsay(s)’s that turned me from one of “those” fitness nuts to an actual healthy living being. Like you, I am definitely not perfect in my eating or my workouts, but I think that accepting my imperfections, not comparing myself to others, and figuring out balance and moderation have made me a better person, more physically healthy and far more sane overall. In the end, we’re left with only ourselves and no one to judge us but ourselves (and God) – so choose to please who you will. Love the post, love the thoughts behind it, and love that you’re confident enough to share it with the world. :)
POWERFUL! Thank you Lindsay for this!! I know God has been working on my heart as well. Sometimes I can be way too critical of others, and I come to realize that it is not my place to judge. God didn’t give me that role… Praise the Lord! I’m so thankful that God doesn’t judge me the way that I sometimes judge others!
this was fabulous! i totally agree – about a year ago i would have put myself in that category 100% but i’ve made a major conscious effort to let go a little bit (even though it’s hard) scale back my exercise – aka cardio queen – lift some heavy weights – carb up – fat up & enjoy life! still a work in progress but i know i’ve made it a point to avoid blogs who promote way non healthy habits
Amen.
Egg yolks are not bad for you. :) But I still like this post. You’re awesome.
Isn’t God AH-MAZING?! I’ve been going to church one way, and coming out a different person every week for the last month. It’s a revival in my heart, I tell ya. I love you!
I hear ya. (obviously… my blog has “beers” in the title, haha)
I definitely learned it’s not my place to judge other bloggers this weekend at HLS. I don’t know their story or where they are in their journey right now. Also, I don’t worry about the label healthy living blogger. To me, it’s not about being perfect, it’s about doing your best without being too hard on yourself. There is no such thing as perfect, the key is to love yourself and just do your best.
Great post Lindsey! I’ve done the same thing. Just the other day I was telling my husband I feel like an impostor because I say I’m a “healthy living” blogger and yet I still do my fair share of unhealthy things! Like my addiction to potato chips! Sad but true. I’ve changed the views of certain things about myself and I’m working on them. We’re always a work in progress ;)
Lindsay, you have been such a great source of inspiration to me lately! I love how you learn (God teaches) you lessons about everyday life/things that we all deal with. Be blessed!
Once again. Your words blow me away. Utterly and truly. THANK YOU for this reminder that we were not created by God to judge. Ourselves, eachother, anyone. Not our place, nor do we have the room in our days to wastefully spend time judging. Thank you thank you thank you for this. xo
Holy let it sink in lady. This post knocked the wind right out of me. I’m actually trying to wrap my head around my thoughts. First of all, I miss you- A LOT. Second of all, I totally have sugar free drinks- A LOT. Third- I took my kids through the McDonald’s drive thru the other day. Ugh. Fourth- I overindulged in way too much chocolate, wine and carbs last night. I’m feeling like I should throw in my healthy living blogging towel. I also feel a little bit like crying. Weird.
Oh no no!! Don’t be so hard on yourself! I think you’re AMAZING! You’re a great mom to two wonderful boys, you run like a champ and you’re so creative with recipes! There is no such thing as perfect, it’s about trying to do your best while enjoying your life!
I’ve done this before, too. In fact, I’ve gone and written an entire blog post, went to bed, woke up and read it before posting, only to realize it’s way to b*tchy/judgmental to actually post. Then I’m out a blog post, but still. Crazy, the signs He sends us :)
Great posts lately, Lindsay – <3 you!
PS – I did not read this egg yolk news either. Very tragic news :(
I hadn’t heard the egg yolk news either, so I looked a little deeper and there are more reports coming out saying that “more research is needed.” It was just one study that didn’t factor in other causes that might have caused the high plaque in the arteries. Sorry to hijack, I am just a giant nerd when it comes to these things :)
thanks for making me think deeply this morning, Lindsay.
so many people around me ARE judgemental; it’s easy for it to seep into your brain if you’re not careful…
can i just exclaim YES?!
Um, apparently we are sharing a brain when it comes to this topic? I have actually been thinking up of how to write a post about the same concerns and frustrations recently, but then I stop myself because I realize that I’ve been there, I’m not perfect, and I have no place to judge them. It’s THEIR bodies, THEIR health, THEIR lifestyle – not mine. Thank you for taking the words right out of my mouth! :)
Great post! Sometimes I feel similarly to you when I read blogs, but then I remind myself to just focus on my own journey to health & happiness and be the best possible role model I can be for others. If I don’t like a blog, I just stop reading.
You have no idea how much I love this post! Thank you so much for sharing. I’m really glad that you didn’t write a ranty post (that’s my job ;) because as much as it bothers you (and ME), at the end of the day, it’s not our job to judge and we should continue working on ourselves.
And for the record I think you’re making leaps and bounds with your ED. I think there’s a cycle that some people go through when they are working through getting over it. Overexcercising seems to be the last part in the cycle … coupled with eating treats as calories to make up for those extra ones you burnt off that kind of feel bad about burning since you’re trying to get past your ED. I think you’re at the point of mostly body image issues and less ED issues (at least from what you share on your blog) and this is where I was at about 5 years ago and am FINALLY getting over some of the body image issues (not gonna lie … it takes professional help).
LOVE YOU!!
Wow, thank you for this girl. It’s always easier to point the finger at someone else and say they are the problem instead of looking at ourselves and working on our own flaws. I just started writing something along the lines of this as I’ve been under some harsh critism in blog land lately getting judging comments and rather opinionated emails about how people feel about me. But such is life right. We are who we are and aren’t who we aren’t. And than life goes on.
Great post–and way to go–to reflect upon what you were thinking and about to do.
But I also have to add . . . are you serious about the eggs?!? When will they make up their minds? Some days they’re the best food ever, and the next day they’re terrible for you. I’m so confused!!!
Such great thoughts to meditate on for a Monday morning!!!! Also.. lol… I’ve been concerned about the eggs thing too!! That can’t be true!!
GREAT POST! Sometimes the health and wellness community can become really competitive, rather than the supportive/awesome place that it should be. And there people in it at varying stages of their journey (some at extremes on either end of the spectrum). It is all about the journey and the process.
I need to keep this top of mind more often in my day to day… because I go go OFF on a rant (even if it is only in my head most of the time).
P.S. The yolks are okay in moderation as long as you don’t have heart disease! ;)
I love this post. I have gone to haughty on my blog before – and I wish I could remove all of those haughty remarks for good. I actually have removed some posts because looking back, I WAS being self righteous. It’s a fine line to walk – I have written many of those “kick ass” posts in my head too. You nailed it with :”I want to redefine my life – not someone else’s”
Love this post Lindsay. The “judging” thing goes beyond blogs … it happens with parenting, family issues, financial decisions, everything. SO important to remember that the only blameless one is God. Thank you for reminding me today.
I always know I can come to your blog for an outstanding post and here is yet another one! I think we all have some work to do on ourselves before we can start judging everyone else! I myself have many things to work on that I may not be the proudest of but I do acknowledge need to change! You are just so inspiring :)
and that was God’s purpose all along. Amazing. thank you God for being the blameless one and forgiving us who are not. Healthy or not, we need judge not. Amen?
Such a humbling reminder….I am created to trust, and to love, not to judge. God used you today to speak that truth and for that I am thankful, Lindsay. Blessings to you.
Thank you so much for this post. Recently I’ve become aware that I’ve spent more time looking at/blaming others regarding health related issues instead of “taking the plank out of my own eye.” This was the kind of gentle direction I needed to get down on my knees. I appreciate the post–and you!
**tip toes away…filled with thought**